I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
