is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
