new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
this will be a night to untag.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Randomize
