Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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