Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
