i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Sacagawea was the original milf.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize