But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
