She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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