I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
