Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Randomize
