You really coming over, don't trick.
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
