No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
