I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
