my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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