I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
