What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
