member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Boobs speak an international language.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
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