At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
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