she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
