Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize