Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
