Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Randomize
