I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
The power of my boobs compel you
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
