Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
