I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
