Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
