hell yes lets make some ravioli
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
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