She said her name was "party"
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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