what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
