I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
