great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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