I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
they're like a gay fantastic four
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
