4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
