By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
