This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
