So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
