Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
