Need sex. Gaining weight.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
