Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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