we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
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