so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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