holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize