you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
