turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize