how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
