we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
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