I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Randomize
