HIV tests are more positive than that guy
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
