nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
