Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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